Are your Parents Elderly?

9780994643155-Perfect_Gail Miller.indd“Tell me if this sounds familiar. Mum or Dad won’t talk about the next stage of their life and get snappy whenever you broach the subject.”

“And, then, what happens next? You leave after yet another unhappy conversation and go home worrying about what will happen to them if they stay in their own home. Will they be safe? Will they cope? So your sleep suffers, your work suffers and meanwhile you’ve still got to look after your own family. The overwhelm feels like a black cloud descending on you. Am I right?”

“Well, imagine how it would FEEL if I could tell you about professionals who could do all the hard work for you, including a mediation session to help get Mum and Dad onside. Imagine how well you’ll be able to sleep knowing that the paperwork is being done by people who do it everyday, so you don’t have to learn all the government legislation or Centrelink rules to enable you to complete the forms. And imagine how much easier it will be when they do all the hard work of finding the homes that will best suit your folks and you only have to choose from 3. Would that make you feel better? ”

You get any or all of the 5 professionals to do the process for you, so you can do what you’re best at – your job and caring for your family. And you get to sleep well at night knowing that the experts are sorting everything out.

10 Insights

1/ Navigating the Aged Care process alone is like asking a 5 year old to write a thesis on an unknown topic!

2/ Your parents will probably decline whilst you’re still working and possibly still have your own family to care for.

3/ Even easy-going parents can become tricky as they age and become more frail.

4/ Broken hips, strokes and even dementia can create a crisis in the twinkling of an eye.

5/ Parents often think they’re bullet proof and will live forever.

6/ Most people don’t want to plan ahead for aged care because they think there’s no urgency.

7/ Very few of the elderly will discuss their end-of-life wishes.

8/ An advance Care Directive – ACD – (which replaces a Power of Guardianship) can only be made if a person is of sound mind. It’s not possible to sign an ACD even with early stage dementia.

9/ Forward planning will ease the emotional burden when it’s time to go into care.

10/ Prepare now before there’s a crisis.

TIP ~ Remember that your children may be leading you on this path one day! Consider that when dealing with your parents.

Case Study 1 ~

Maud and Fred lived in the same house for over 50 years. Fred was becoming more doddery and more demanding of his wife who had made every meal and every cup of tea for over 60 years!

Maud’s hearing was failing and a dicky ticker caused blood pressure fluctuations that left her feeling faint far too often.

Their only child, Susie, delicately suggested they downsize to a retirement village and was met with stern disapproval.

The idea of sorting through six decades of clutter terrified them. Thus it was that their move happened in their late 80’s, about ten years too late!

Case Study 2 ~

Fiona and Dave had been married for 48 years. Both were successful professionals until Dave was forced into retirement by memory issues. The progress of dementia was slow at first, but gained speed as time went on. All the while, Fiona seemed to be ageing at a more rapid speed, but insisted that they were managing.

As Dave lapsed into his happy little world of oblivion, Fiona began to question her own memory as she could never find the paper on which she wrote her last reminder note. After insisting for a long time that she could manage, Fiona eventually realised that she could no longer keep Dave at home, so she completed the paperwork for Aged Care. Although very wealthy, she wouldn’t pay professionals to help, so she struggled on, close to the point of collapse.

Logic and reason play no part when one is so exhausted.

An unfortunate, but common story!

What’s the solution?

Stop trying to be Wonder Woman or Superman doing it all yourself!

5 professionals can do all the hard work and their fees will hardly dent the bank account.

They will put their experience to work by –

1/ Sorting the clutter

2/ Sorting the Will, ACD and Power of Attorney

3/ Finding the right home and doing all the applications

4/ Assessing the finances and advising on the best strategy for each individual client

5/ Advising on Pre-planning and/or Pre-paying the funeral

And this leaves you to look after Mum or Dad’s emotional needs and maintain your own self-care for the onward journey.

Act now before there’s a crisis.

www.solvingtheagedcarepuzzle.comThe Aged Care Puzzle promo

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